BONDA

(Mengingati Mak, Halimah bt Habibah yang pergi menemui Ilahi pada 2 Muharram 1433/ 28 November 2011)

Apakah yang boleh dikhabarkan kepada insan-insan

bila perginya bonda tersayang

menghembuskan nafas di akhir kali

sedang mereka tiada di sisi

Adakah kata-kata yang memadai

mengubat luka dan kesal di hati

selain memujuk diri

segalanya ketentuan Ilahi

sejak azali

Apakah yang boleh dibisikkan kepada kekasih bonda

yang teruntun jiwanya kehilangan sebuah cinta

hanya ungkapan bersabar tetapi menangislah, ayahanda

Rasulullah yang kehilangan Khadijah Baginda

jua sugul buat seketika

Maka kita tidak terkecuali

daripada rasa lara ini

Apakah yang boleh kita ingati tentang bonda

Terlalu banyak bolehkah dihitung

Awal hayat kita dikandung

Setiap takat usia kita dilindung

walau sekadar melalui doa kepada yang Agung

Bolehkah kita lupakan bonda

Sedangkan dalam darah daging ini mengalir susu ibu

Setiap alunan lunakmu pengubat hati sendu

Setiap pujukanmu mendinginkan kalbu

Setiap kata bonda menjadi pandu

Bolehkah kami hidup tanpamu

Setiap detik dan ketika mengenangmu

Bila dilanda sangsi mencarimu

Bila bahagia ingin kongsi tawamu

Bila hati duka rindukan doamu

Tidak kira ketika, ingin terus bersamamu

Bonda,

Dengarkah suara hati kami ini

Memohon sentiasa pada Yang Satu

agar perjalanan bonda ke Hari Penentu

Allah permudahkan tanpa halangan

Terimalah janji kami

Usah gusar tentang kekasih hati di sini

selagi hayatnya di bumi

kami akan memberi bakti

agar tenang hidupnya walau tanpamu di sisi

Bonda,

Terimalah rasa yang terbuku di hati

Kami mohon ampun dari hujung rambut ke hujung kaki

Tiada makna hidup kami

tanpa restumu mengiringi

dan bonda,

walaupun berakhir masa kita bersama di duniawi

doa kami sentiasa di hati

agar kita bertemu lagi di alam yang abadi.

Al-Fatihah.

5-6 December 2011/ 9-10 Muharram 1433

Birthday Baking

Hey, it's Auntida's birthday today. Thank you for all the kind wishes from family and friends. Auntie's best wishes was from Wan this morning. Although Wan was a bit hesitant and shy to wish Auntie, Auntie appreciate her effort. Both Wan and Aki were not used to wishing their children or anyone else Happy Birthday but Auntie suppose our enthusiasm and 'make-a-fuss' attitude each time their birthdays or anniversaries came must have rubbed off on them somehow. Since one or two yrs ago, Aki had started sms-ing his children during their birthdays. Wan is a bit of a late-bloomer. Last year she wished Auntie when Aki called to wish (tumpang sekaki la tu :) ). This yr she was bolder. But she made Auntie's day.

Today is also Ogabang's Mak's birthday. Her 75th. So Ogabang belanja Auntie and Mak dia biryani Hameediyah (tapau), which lasted until dinner.

Anyways, the best way to celebrate a birthday, in Auntie's opinion, is probably just to rest and do nothing or do whatever comes to mind during the day. So, Auntie decided to just stay in, watch "Hantu Kak Limah Pulang ke Rumah" (earlier part was entertaining but half way through Auntie lost the plot) and after dinner, do some baking. Here's Auntie's baking results:

'Half' scones. Auntie rolled the pastry a little bit thin, so it turned out to be only one side of a scone.

Butter cookies. Look horrible but yummy! 

Good night, everyone. May Allah bless us all.

Kiddies through the years

Auntida loves all Auntida's kiddies and most of them are somewhat attached to Auntida since very young. Auntie was not around them much when Along/ Ya and Aiman were babies and toddlers and their are not so manja with Auntie, but Auntida was always aware of their development.  Kakak aka Shasha and Jijin used to be very partial to Auntida but as they grow, children have their own things and they may find it less needful for an 'Auntie' figure. Auntie is sure they still all have very affectionate feelings towards Auntie.

Auntie first saw Shasha when she was about 3 weeks old. Auntie remembered driving back to KL bringing Mommy and Shasha with Wan and Aki after Mommy's berpantang stay at Wan's.  The first 2 years of Shasha's life, Auntie visited her often in KL so she was close to Auntie. When she could talk, Auntie remembered Mommy telling Auntie that whenever Auntie had gone back from her home to Penang she would keep asking "Auntie mana, Ma, Auntie" [Shasha liked to repeat words like that when she was two].  When Shasha was about 5, Auntie went to visit her in St Louis, USA [she went with Mommy and Daddy when she was about 2 1/2. Mommy was doing her PhD]. Shasha was elated Auntie could spend Raya with her. We had a really good time together and Shasha was so sad when Auntie had to leave.  But both Shasha and Qin [and Ajmal too] do not like goodbyes so they would be stern-looking and devil-may-care when they had to say goodbye.

Jijin also went overseas when she was about 2 [Ayah went to study]. A yr and half later when she came back, she was about 4yrs old. Jijin also became close to Auntie. Actually, masa Jijin lahir, Auntie was staying overnight at Ayah & Umi's house coz Auntie had work around KL. At around midnight, Umi finished grading her students' papers and went up to bed. Barely an hour later, Ayah kejut Auntie to follow them to the hospital coz Umi's water just broke. Within 3 hours of reaching the hospital, Umi gave birth to Jijin. After Jijin balik from UK, Jijin was the youngest kiddies for some time. Jijin came back from UK a few months before Auntie kenal Uncle Z. When Auntie started dating Uncle Z and told him Auntie ada niece nama "Jijin", Uncle Z kata "Ha? Niece you nama Jin?" Pokak badak betui! Actually, Umi & Ayah first called Jijin "Reen" or "Shakireen" tapi Jijin sendiri yg bahasakan diri dia Jijin, so lekat sampai sekarang. Before Auntida got married, Jijin was very close to Auntida and selalu nak tidur ngan Auntida bila jumpa. Lepas Auntida's wedding, Jijin would intermittently came into Auntida's bedroom, looked at Uncle Z and asked "Auntida kawin ke?" Then she would ran out of the room. She looked so amazed :). Auntie rasa she actually wanted to come sleep with Auntie tapi ada satu 'makhluk' besar lain kat sebelah Auntie, mana nak muat katil!  Jijin is a very generous and thoughtful person. She would always save up school money to give as presents to siblings on birthdays. She would make cards for them and include RM1 or RM2 as present. One Raya, she gave duit raya RM2 each to Wan and Aki.

At the moment, Ajmal pun very manja ngan Auntie.  Bila Auntida datang rumah mesti nak tunjuk and cerita apa dia buat. Ajmal is so keletah and tak pelat. For example, he would say his name properly: "A-je-mal". Masa Auntida visit Ajmal kat Kuala hari tu when he finally saw Auntie arriving, dia komplen "Jauh sangat ke rumah Auntida ni, lambat sangat sampai". And then dia tanya "Rumah Auntida hotel ke?" Both Qin and Ajmal thought that Auntida & Uncle Z live in a hotel. For Qin because whenever Auntie was in KL, Auntie selalu stay in a hotel and she would come and visit. Kadang-kadang Uncle Z was also in the hotel room with Auntie.  Ajmal came to Auntie's apartment in Penang. Since dia tak biasa tengok orang duduk dalam rumah tinggi except in hotel, he must have thought rumah Auntie tu hotel.

The most manja of all kiddies, with Auntie, is, of course, Qin. And Qin is very expressive about her feelings. She constantly tells Auntie she loves Auntie. Qin is generally a happy person. She is rarely in a bad mood kecuali bila lapar, panas & mengantuk [sounds familiar?].  She has a positive outlook on things and is a good diplomat [Wan selalu puji Qin for her physically affectionate nature- "Cucu Wan yg sorang ni pandai betul ambil hati Wan. Selalu cium Wan...tak payah suruh"].  She would say to Mommy, "Mommy, your a very good cook...but Auntida makes the best cupcakes!" Masa Qin was about 7 or 8 months old and came to visit Auntida in Penang, Mommy, Daddy and Auntida had to leave Qin and Kakak with Uncle Z for a few hours to run some errands.  Qin loved to sit on Uncle Z's tummy and when Qin merengek and Uncle Z tatau nak buat apa, dia letak Qin in the closet [no danger was caused to kids or animals in this stunt, I assure you]. Qin terus senyap and gelak. Qin suka closet rupanya :). Qin simply loves to bake with Auntida. She's proudly nominated herself as "Mommy's & Auntida's handy helper".  In kindie, teacher commended Qin for being 'diplomatic' and 'having leadership quality'.

All of Auntie's kiddies are quite musical and artistic. Ya, Aiman & Shasha are all interested in musical instruments and are learning to play the piano, guitar and violin.  Jijin used to like to sing and dance and she is also the resident voice-over expert coz she was 'hired' by Uncle Z to 'star' in one of Uncle Z's video productions for a client. Jijin's first job. Qin definitely loves stage performance and had been an enthusiastic participant in kindie's concerts doing the Jai-ho and Mamamia. Ajmal? Well, Ajmal just loves Ultramen and can act the hero movements like a pro :).

All kiddies are growing so fast before Auntie's eyes.  Along, Aiman and Sha are taking important exams this year. Jijin is std 4.  Ajmal does not want to go to kiddie's school yet. But he has some time.  It is Qin's second day of school today. Yesterday was her first. The night before she had to go to school for the first time, Auntida called her to wish good luck and to wish that she would enjoy school. She didn't sound too enthusiastic about it but was not unhappy either. It's like she was taking it in her stride like everything else. Yesterday, Qin called Auntie a few times but Auntie's phone was out of battery and Auntie was out in Tesco. She called home and Uncle Z picked up. Uncle Z said she sounded so excited to talk to Auntida but when Uncle Z said Auntida was not home yet, she sounded so disappointed. When Auntie called back, Qin was already asleep. Mommy said she wanted to tell Auntie how everything went alright in school and that there was an ice-cream man right in front of her school (Qin simply loves food!).  Today also we missed each other on the phone again. She told Mommy that Auntida would have been real proud of her coz she fared quite well in school today. Mommy taught her how to buy food at the canteen. The pick-up and drop-off from-school-by-hired-car trial run also went quite well. Tomorrow Qin will be on her own. Mommy will probably be dropping by only in the afternoon to see if pick up from school is ok.

In a few days, Qin will be an old hand at Yr One schooling. Before long, Ajmal will be totting a hefty Ben 10 school bag to a first day at 'real' school. In a matter of years, Along, Aiman & Shasha will be in college/ uni. Jijin will be taking their place, living the life of a teenager. In a decade or so, Auntie may get nieces/nephews in-laws and four or five yrs after that grand-kiddies. Such is life. If Allah deems it, Auntie may yet get a baby of my own, natural or otherwise, after all kiddies grow up. Or other kiddies from Mommy, Acik Din or Mushu [Ayah & Umi maybe dah tutup kedai]. Whatever it is, Auntie's love for all present six kiddies will surely remain. They will always have special places in Auntie's heart. They have coloured Auntie's life for the past 16 or so years and will continue to do so for the rest of Auntie's life. Auntie is forever grateful to Allah for their presence and to their parents for unconditionally sharing them with Auntie.  May Allah continue to bless them with his Rahmah and Rahim. Amin.

OK, that's the end of reminiscing. Here are some pics of kids over the years, in some-but-not-strict chronological order [pics are mostly of younger kiddies coz older kiddies pics are mostly non-digitalised yet:

Qin in November 2004- a few days old 

 Shasha, Along/ Ya & Aiman. Can't remember how Shasha and Ya got to have 'twin' dresses.  Aiman is 2 weeks younger than Shasha. At the moment, Shasha is the only family member that Aiman has added as his FB friend.

Qin 3 months and 2 days old. This is why Kakak aka Shasha used to call her Chubs. 

 Qin, just before a year old. She had lost her chubbiness but regained it later.

Qin on her first birthday. Pakai topi yg Kakak & Auntida made for her. From Kakak's sarung bantal punya kain perca. Shasha was into sewing at the time.

Ajmal, 2006. A few weeks old.

Dah bulat.

Ajmal with Uncle Zach. About a year old kot.

Qin with Cat Juice.

Ajmal yg nakal. "I'm gonna get ya!"

Qin in Mommy's closet. When she was a few months old, Uncle Z put her in our closet and she liked it.

Qin and Auntida. [Uncle Joe kat belakang]

Ustazah Aryssa Rizqin.

Qin and Shasha. Studio photo in the St Louis. 

Jijin in baju kurung sewn by Auntie.

 Qin, posing.

Qin and Mommy. Qin in one of her not-so-sunny mood. Sebab panas!

Ajmal. Concentrating.

Ajmal. Concentrating again.

Qin in May, last year.

 Kakak, Auntie & Qin, celebrating Kakak's 14th birthday.

Qin, 6 yrs, 1 month and 17 days old. At school, this morning. Silent reading session, 15 minutes before class start.

Good night, my lovelies. Sweet dreams.

Auntida's 2010

It has been a very busy 2010 for Auntida. A lot of travel. Perhaps the most number of research field work that Auntie had ever done in the past 15 yrs as a postgrad student and an academic.  Also, probably the most number of international people that Auntie have ever met. Some new possessions. Some new responsibilities. Some family crises. Many good family moments. Some growing up done.  Some immaturity remains. Perhaps lesser number of conflicts with Ogabang (who's counting?). Still the same amount of 'conflict' [if any] with friends. A few impatient moments. Perhaps, generally, an increased tolerance of people. Alhamdulillah, definitely a general increase in rezeki, monetary or otherwise. Some rezeki being taken away, perhaps as a lesson from Allah about gratitude.

These are some pics to illustrate some events in Auntida's 2010 life:

JANUARY

On the last day before the year of 2010, Auntida and 3 gang Badak did our much-missed ritual of exchanging cheap gifts. The rule was each gift must not be over RM10 [tak silap] but we didn't put a limit on number of gifts. These were some gifts yg Auntida dapat. Utk melindungi identity gang badak yg berpakaian kurang presentable semasa exchange gifts ni, gambar2 gifts yg lain tidak dapat ditunjuk.

We also took advantage of the new year long weekend to do makan-makan di samping menyambut birthday Ogabang, which fell on 5th Jan. The birthday boy holding his cake, a gift from kakak2,  adik2 and anak2 Badak.

Auntie also had the chance to be part of the celebration of Pak Long Ami's birthday [19th Jan] when Auntie had to work in KL. We celebrated it at Mommy's on the 16th Jan

In late January 2010, we acquired a new asset. After a 2yr stint of single-car ownership, we decided a second car is no longer a luxury but a necessity to avoid familial/ couple conflict :).  Some of the important reasons include that Auntie was given added responsibilities at work and need to travel to meetings, Ogabang need to take his mom to hospital appointments which would sometimes coincide with Auntie's meeting schedules and Auntie sometimes need to stay back late at the office while Ogabang may need to go buy early dinner for himself and for his parents. But the real reason is probably so that we can go home to Kuantan in greater comfort and so that Ogabang could angkut balik barang2 from Kedai Cowboy!

We still love Ms Red very much. This has been Auntie's ride from January 2010 onwards, even at one point to use to go for field work to Kuantan.

FEBRUARY

Sunrise at Summerset Rompin

In February, Auntie was on field work trip to Rompin with mamachupan and Samantha. We also brought our families and extended families with us so that the work could be coupled with fun. One of the best moments in Rompin was this sunrise gazing with friends.

MARCH

March is of course, Auntida's birthday month. Office gals bought Auntie this cake. Auntie had various celebrations with friends and family after that.

March was also the month for Ajmal's birthday [3rd March]:

APRIL

In April, Auntie had an office retreat in Langkawi. Only had work pics except this one, which is a view from the hotel room. Ogabang tagged along because he was involved partially in the work.

April 12 and 30 were Jijin's and Shasha's birthday but we celebrated them during Auntie's visit to KL in early May:

 Jijin, Auntie & Umi

Auntie & Shasha

MAY

Aiman's birthday was on 16th May

The highlight of May was the Tok Bibah's clan family day on the 29th of May. Here are some pics:

 The Family Day was in memory of our beloved Tok Bibah who passed away on the 21st of May 2003. It was an inaugural family day and is agreed to be repeated, perhaps, every 2 or 3 yrs in the future.

The cake ordered by Umi from her friend. It turned out her friend was also Auntie's recently (2010) acquainted friend.

 Mommy introducing the Halimah/ Endut sub-clan by reading pantun penned by Auntida.

 The Red sub-clan. Nothing to do with the group in Malaysia's northern neighbour.

The sub-clan official pic.

JUN

Auntie's first overseas trip for the year was to Seoul, Korea, for work. Auntie was there for 5 days:

 First lunch in Korea

 We were definitely very well fed by our Korean colleagues.

Shopping, near our hotel. Auntie like the statue at the back.

In June also, Mommy and family came for a weekend at Auntie's place. In our excitement, we forgot to take pictures except for this:

Qin and her toys on Auntie's floor.

JULY

July saw one of Auntie's dream travel destination: Australia. Simply because it was relatively near but Auntie had not had a chance to visit. Auntie attended 2 conferences in Melbourne. Auntie was there for a total of 2weeks including 3 nights in Tasmania. Auntie went with mamachupan. For the first week, another colleague and mamachupan's sister also joined us.

 First dinner out in Melbourne...

 At this Afghan place.

 This was one serving. Worth all the $16.00.

Our hotel was 5 minutes walk to the famous Victoria Market. We love it!

Our mode of transport for 2 weeks

During the weekend between two conferences, 3 of us rented a car and took a trip along the Great Ocean Road. This is one breathtaking scenery along the way.

We stopped for lunch at a fish n chips shop. Yum! Yum!

Because of unexpectedly lengthy detour, we arrived at the famous 12 apostle almost at dusk, so light was fading. But through the naked eyes, the view was still breathtaking.

One of the cake shops at St Kilda 

Auntie's favourite cookies at the conferences. The Anzac cookies.

The last four days of time in Australia was spent in Tasmania with Auntie's new-found friend Farid. She is a close friend of mamachupan. Thank you Farid and family for the marvelous and gracious hospitality. Tak terbalas. Auntie did not have many pics of Tassie because Auntie's camera ran out of batteries. Also we were too busy eating to take pics :). But a few views of Launceston, Tassie. We also drove to Hobart for a day trip. These pics were taken on the way to Hobart.

AUGUST & SEPTEMBER

August and September were the Ramadhan and Syawal months. Auntie went home to Kuantan for Raya and brought Wan & Aki back to Penang after Raya. Two days before Raya Wan had a small operation on her foot and Auntie persuaded her to be looked after by Auntie in Penang.

 An example of berbuka dish. We decided to eat simply for Ramadhan 2010.

 Auntie's Raya baking project. The signature chocolate cake...

And chocolate chip cookies. 

 Auntie's 'kerastangan' Raya cookie jars.

 Aki & Wan with new friends Uncle Johar & Mummy

End of September, Pak Long Ami buat kenduri for his impending Haj trip. So it was agreed that Auntie would take Wan & Aki back to KL. Tapi ada special order for the cookies pulak. All those bottles went to KL. 

 Together with this carrot cake, which was gone so quickly, everyone said he/she did not have enough of it.

 Auntie's students also organised a Raya do so Auntie baked this Congo bars to bring to the event.

Auntie's students and colleagues.

August was also Along's, Maksu's and Acik Din's birthday but Auntie didn't have pics of birthday celebrations.

OCTOBER

Auntie resumed travel in October. This time to Singapore and Yogyakarta. Auntie only has pics of Yogya:

 Nasi padang in Yogya

NOVEMBER

Auntie spent first few days of November in Langkawi for a writing retreat.

 We stayed at a resort with this kind of accommodation.

 Auntie also bought  Red Lady Luna in November.

18th November was Qin's 6th birthday but Auntie could not celebrate with Qin. What Auntie managed was to see Qin before her birthday and decorate a cake with her.  We also spent the day swimming and having dinner together.  Auntie thought about the cake after seeing Auntie's friend's doll cake projects on her FB. Thank you, Atty, for inspiring me [you can click on her name to go to her blog, which displays pretty kiddies cake pictures].  But Auntie did not bake the cake from scratch. Auntie use shop-bought cakes and just shape and ice them:

 The icing of the cake, in progress.

 Auntie didn't have pics of the complete cake.

During dinner. Just the 2 of us.

DECEMBER

Auntie had a little accident in early December.

So, Auntie had quite an eventful 2010 but generally Auntie is grateful to Allah for all His rahmah and rezeki. Auntie prays for more.

What's left to do is to welcome 2011 and may Allah continue to bless us all.

Good 'night' everyone!